Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Quit Lip Syncing or You Will End Up on a Dark Stinky Stage

In fifth grade, my friends and I signed-up for a school-wide talent show.

I secretly dreamed of standing on stage and reciting poetry. However, I was socially aware enough to know reciting poetry on stage translates into eternal dorkdom, and I decided to showcase my skills in a much more hip way: lip-syncing Madonna’s “Like A Virgin”.

Hello, adults, where were you?

My lip-syncing, dance crew realized a rocking performance takes planning and preparation, and we threw ourselves into both. Preparation included figuring out answers to the following important questions:

What would we wear?

What color puffy paint should accent our shoes?

Should we leave our hair down or pull it back?

Could we possibly sneak some “stage make-up” from our mothers?

And again, what would we wear?

Although our group met frequently, we never practiced our dance routine. We all knew the song, so mouthing the words came easily, and the dance steps? Oh, those little details always fall together. Right?


The dance steps never actually fell together, and on the day of the talent show, our five, person crew stood on a dark stage in a stinky gym. A red jam box blared something about “being touched for the very first time”. We mouthed words into our fake microphones, and danced the one move we knew: step, sway, step, sway, step sway.

Pretending to dance for three minutes on a dark stage taught me two things:

1. No one pays attention to matching, puffy painted shoes in a dark, stinky gym.

2. God gives us talents, all of us, but ignoring your talent (poetry), and going for a cooler talent (lip-syncing) doesn’t work.
Let's hear it. Any funny talent show stories? Tell me I wasn't the only one showcasing my skills on stage. Is there a skill you have, but don't embrace?
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Image credit. 


Gaby said...

This may sound stupid but leadership. Hate it. Can't stand to be in charge. Always find myself in charge. And things don't go terribly after all. Still. Do not like it. I tell myself I am a great right hand person for a good leader but my drive to get things done and frustration when they don't get done means I'm always saying: "let's do this" and it seems to be heard as "I'm in charge" when I'm secretly begging for someone else to say: "Yeah! let's do it" and then I can just help. Not a funny story, sorry :)

Lisa said...

So funny. In high school The fellowship of Christian students did a rendition of DC Talk's Jesus Freak at the school talent show. Let's just say my head banging gave me a label for awhile afterwards, it wasn't Jesus Freak. It was only freak :)

Mrs. Pedersen said...

Haha! Too Funny. ;-)

Mindy Whipple said...

When we were just a bit younger than fifth grade my neighborhood girls and I decided to put on a show. We sent out invitations to all the kids in the neighborhood telling them it was going to be a really good show. It would not have been and thankfully they knew better and only the "performers" showed up. We had fun anyhow but it was an early lesson in humility haha...

Barb said...

You were much braver than I ever was. I never signed up at all ... poetry or otherwise. Bravo!

Amy Sullivan said...

I hear you on leadership. I always say I'm a better second. . .

The Wyatt Family said...

Oh my, I can't believe I am going to tell you this, but it is true:

In the 5th grade I was in our school talent show. A group of cool girls lip-synced and fake-played guitars/drums/keyboards to Bon Jovi's "Living on a Prayer". They wore cool clothes and had the entire school singing along with Bon Jovi. It was so, completely cool.

I went on right after them, playing my guitar, dressed like a hillbilly (complete with braids, plaid shirt, cutoffs and painted on freckles) and played/sang a simple, slow version of The Crawdad Song:

I sang it through two times, then (on the advice of my father, God bless him) actually said "Everybody sing!" for the last verse.

My 2nd grade little brother stood to his feet and sang his heart out with me.

He was the only one.

You want to talk 'eternal dorkdom'? I think I got the market cornered on that one, my friend. ;-)

Amy Sullivan said...


So this story makes me love you even more!

First of all, who can possibly follow-up Bon Joni's "Living on a Prayer". It was a bad set up from the start.

Second, this makes me love your brother with my entire heart. It's awesome that even when they drive us crazy siblings are the first to stand to their feet and belt out the words so we aren't left hanging.

Third (do you like my obnoxious use of transition words?) you can't live in eternal dorkdom because you are so real and cool and anyone can lip-sync, but it takes someone with guts to sing The Crawdad song which btw, I never heard.

Thank you for sharing this story. I mean it has like five life lessons jam packed into one little tale.

Traveling Pirate said...

High school pep rally.
10 sophomore girls.
Song - The Devil Went Down to Georgia with words changed to fit the Lowell Red Devils Went Down to Kougar Kountry.
800 students watching.
Barb fake playing fiddle.

Thank goodness no one had cell phones back then to record the moment.

David Rupert said...

Lip syncing to me is simply faking it. And I do it. I go through the motions, concerned about how I look and how others perceive and forget the fact that I'm empty and void....going through the motions


I knew from the title that I would love this story ... and I love it when women know what their gifts are and find joy in using them. Our Bible Study this Saturday morning is about that.


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