2/27/11

Midlife Crisis or Midlife Fun?

Looking in awe at the blessings in my life, and counting gifts with Ann today.

I’m grateful for girls who understand that dressing up in old bridesmaid dresses doesn’t mean midlife crisis, but midlife fun {10}.








Sunday afternoon tennis dates {11}.
Five Guys Burgers and Fries {12}.
A mother/daughter meet-up in Louisville {13}.
My beat-up, back deck {14}.
An upcoming writers' conference. . .eeek {15}.
Small fingers full of ketchup {16}.
Tiny feet making a little trampoline squeak {17}.

Happy Monday, friends.

Oh, and I was sort-of joking about me being "midlife". However, after a quick google, I realized, surprise, 36 is indeed midlife. I must go and continue about my day in celebration.

2/26/11

Thoughts from a Week Old Marriage


We lingered on a deck half a world away.

We discussed facts and faith and future happenings.

We named hypothetical babies.

We planned careers.

We imagined limitless paths.

We mapped life.

We left out clutter.

We omitted stuff.

We never said, “We definitely need a car that seats eight and a house on two acres and a Wii and a zillion outdated VHS tapes and every CD that group ever made.”

But somehow we ended up with all the above.

I think back to what we desired a week into marriage: hope, adventure, crazy-big dreams, spaghetti dinners five nights of week, loads of laughter, a space of our own, kisses at every red light, and grace.

Let me find a way to slow the dizzying pace of life and remember simple dreams.

Do you remember your first-year-of-marriage dreams? What were they? How have your dreams changed?

*Linking up with Cheryl.

2/24/11

When Home is Lost and Gospel Found at a Gas Station (Meet Abby)

Today I'm hands-clasped, jumping up and down excited for you to meet Abby from Fan the Flame. Writer, poet, mama, and friend, this girl won me over months back with her sweet verses and this post. She has a heart for Hungary, a passion for young people, and guess what? Abby's here today to Share Her Story.

Welcome, Abby.

::

“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’” Matthew 25:40

It was the first day of our two day 1000+ mile trip. We were traveling down the East Coast from our hometown in Pennsylvania to where we currently live in Florida. Our children are three and one and yes, on these long trips only, we let them watch that convenience our parents didn’t have…a portable DVD player.

We were only planning to travel one third of the way to my aunt’s house that first day. We decided to take a scenic route through Delaware and avoid the Washington D.C. area that has many a time been like swimming through molasses.

I had already welled up in frustration as that other convenience, GPS, kept steering us back to I-95 and south by way of our nation’s capitol. Doesn’t it understand what I am thinking? Once the new fan-dangled GPS came, our old-fashioned atlas abandoned us, so my husband and I were both trying to remember a way we hadn’t driven in years.

For a stretch we ended up on Route 13 ‘Business’. You know that way you try to bypass as it hits every town and light. We were stopped for gas and I was talking to a friend on my cell phone when a woman knocked on my car window.

She said, “Runnin’ a bit low on gas (this part mumbled), I notice you have a child and I have some books in my car that you might like. I’ll sell them to you dirt cheap.”

I was a bit confused and said, “That’s okay, I don’t think we need any right now.”

She said with a bit of a sigh, “It doesn’t hurt to ask.”

She left and went into the convenience store, but I had this unsettled feeling like I should have taken her up on her offer. When my husband returned to the car, I explained a woman had knocked on my window and I didn’t quite understand, but maybe we should still try to find her and look at those books.

We pulled up for gas and she was at the next pump over with her husband. I sent my husband over to look at the books with a $5 bill and three $1 bills. She had said ‘dirt cheap’ so, if she’d take the $3 then that was what he was to give her!

As my generous-as-the-day-is-long husband returned with the books that were cool, but well used, I knew he had given her ALL of the money and I let out a huff! Our son loved the truck book with movable digger parts and our daughter clung to the Barney book, but this didn’t matter. He wasn’t supposed to give ALL of the money! She was planning to take them to a consignment shop and I knew they would have rejected them because of their condition, so we were doing her a favor.

Here’s where I highlight the stony cold of my heart by the fact that my dear husband had explained that this couple was homeless. Their building had been condemned and he felt like they were to get all $8. This woman had said to him with a smile, "We serve an amazing God!"

He had prayed at the beginning of our trip for safety and that we could bless someone somehow even in the midst of our travel. He knew God had answered, but I resisted.

We are fully supported missionaries who are being stretched right now financially, and this $8 was a part of one of the two $20 bills we received from two dear ladies at church the day before earmarked for our trip home. It was quite clear to me. That meant things we, us, OUR family needed—NOT to be given away! If my husband had his way, he’d give away our last dime, so someone has to rein him in to protect what we need to live!

Well, we are nowhere near our last dime and my husband gets the practical realities much better than I do. Everything we have has been given to us. This is very literally true for us as voluntary-supported missionaries. But, He gets it even better than that. God gives us everything and it is His to move our hearts to do with it as He leads. He understood this when we were earning two full salaries and didn’t have kids.

Well, back to our story. At this point we have our gas, but he realizes one of our tires needs air and who is also getting air for their tire? You guessed it. This same couple.

As he puts air in our tire, he talks with the husband. He finds out more of their story. Their building condemned. Out of work. Children given. over. to. the. state. Just until they can get back on their feet and bring them back home. He didn’t ask my husband for another thing and smiled with a light that only comes from faith in a good God.

My husband had gotten two sandwiches for our lunch. After this conversation, he could barely contain himself for desire to give them more. I am softening (a bit). And easily let go of our second sandwich. Then he wants to give them MORE money. Oh dear, still hard. All we have is the other $20 from the second lady at church and two $100 bills given to us for Christmas by his parents.

He wants to give at least the other $20 bill. And I am still holding on. He rebukes me with “Sweetie, God’s Word is very clear that we are to give to those in need.” Ouch. So I let go and see the smile on this man’s face and know it was the right thing to do.

But, I still have a long way to go.

As we head back on the road I am processing what’s just happened and realize how hard my heart was. I am pouring this out to this dear husband of mine, and he says, ‘but you were the one that first told me about her.’

I am so thankful for the Grace and Love and Goodness of God to give me such a man to walk side-by-side with in this life.

He knew just what I needed on the way Home.

Thank you, Abby. Haven't checked out Fan the Flame? Take a minute and click over to Abby's place.

*Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons

2/23/11

Green Beans Equal Love

It starts with a need.

A family waiting on the release of their ten-day-old baby boy. A daughter making long-term living arrangements for her sick father. A woman undergoing cancer treatment. People who may not know each other, but people sharing the heavy weight of a hospitalized family member. People temporarily living here, the Rathbun Center in Asheville, North Carolina.


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This story involves another group of people. Not a bunch of do-gooders, mind you, just a plain ‘ol regular bunch of people. People who want to help.

Today I'm hanging out at Michelle DeRusha's place, Graceful. You know Michelle. Ultra-talented writer, Hear it on Sunday Use it on Monday host, Shop Not Project girl, and "wresting, questioning, waffling, kind of faith" believer.

Click here to finish reading, and visit both of us.

*Comments closed for today!

2/22/11

Her View on the Rathbun Center


Occasionally, my girl, Amelia blogs about our family’s journey towards gracious giving (all for a quarter!). Sometimes eight-year-old eyes see our family's serving experiences as meaningful. Other times, not so much.

Last week we gathered with friends at the Rathbun Center in Asheville, North Carolina. This home offers free, temporary housing for people who have relatives in nearby hospitals.
If you have read for awhile, you know our family experienced extended hosiptal stays, endless tests, and a baby tied to oxygen for over three years. My insides ache for those who endure similar situations, and that's why I'm thrilled to share about our visit to the Rathbun Center tomorrow at Michelle's. For now, check out what my girl has to say about visiting this "house with a heart".

Guess what I did last Sunday? I whent to the Rathburn Center to confort people who had family in the hospital. Me and my friends Catilyn and Gabby washed the blueberrys, made placemats, made a sign to hang on the door, we gave everyone a colord picture and we asked them what they wanted to drink. We were all tired and it was time to go. we had a fun day.

Love, Amelia
Linking up with Jen and other lovelies. Click over and check us out.

2/20/11

A Gut Check

The facts:

On average, today’s teens spend 7 hours and 45 minutes a day interacting with media (texting and talking on cell phones, plugging into ipods, cruising Facebook, playing video games, and watching TV).

The teen suicide rate is up 400% with the largest increase shown in 11-13 year olds.

2,000 new porn sites are added each day to the internet.

Most fathers spend less than seven minutes a week in meaningful conversation with their children.

Really? Really.

Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Deuteronomy 6:5-7

*Based on today's sermon at my church.

What have you been trying to impress on your children this week? What tough talks are taking place at your home?



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2/19/11

It's That Simple



I write about giving.

I scratch out stories of my family’s life as we try to break from our preoccupation with all things Sullivan.

And through praying and searching and serving and learning, I see our family of four changing, a little.

We met new people, people like Aidan and Angela and Jeff.
We go new places, places like a food bank, River Festival, and Adriane’s house.
We discuss new topics, topics involving far away places and clean water and a little girl, named Audrey.

But sometimes I wonder if our family’s tiny acts of service really change anything at all, and then I read this:

The primary reason Jesus calls us to servanthood is not just because other people need our service. It is because of what happens to us when we serve. –John Ortberg, The Life You’ve Always Wanted.

And that’s it. Our journey simplified. Others may not need our service, but we need to serve. I smile, and I read it again.

Can you think of a time this week when you gained something big from serving in a small way?

The Simplify Journey

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2/17/11

Arriving in Three to Five Days


These two fit in a box, and they just may arrive at your house in three to five days.

Meet Little Miss “I drawing”. Translation: I am using a rock to carve a wonderful piece of art into the side of your car.

And then there is Little Miss “Actually, I don’t think you said that”. Translation: I ignored you the first five times you asked me to get my dance clothes, and even though I heard you on times six, seven, and eight, I found myself too busy to comply.

Sometimes in the cereal spilled, shampoo dumped, laundry scattered happenings of my life, I lose focus of my most important mission, my girls. And sometimes, I overlook all of the lessons they teach me because I’m so determined to impart great wisdom to them.

Yes, thank you notes are imperative, but so are mud caked hands.

Yes, keeping your feet off the table is important, but so is excitement about clouds.

Yes, bananas are a must, but so are Pop Rocks.

What about you? What lessons are your kids teaching you?

Linking up with Erin today.










2/16/11

Share Your Story (Meet Mindy Carettini)

Because I hunger for stories about giving, I love Share Your Story. These sort-of-biweekly guests challenge me to search, see, and acknowledge the joy in giving simple, daily gifts and complex, colossal-sized treasures.

Meet Mindy from Very Unfinished Product. I first heard Mindy’s voice in this amazing piece, and I’ve been clicking around her place ever since. Here’s Mindy.

My husband is a pastor. We are dependant on God’s people giving to the church as our way of providing for our family. It’s helpful in viewing our income as a direct gift from God, although everyone’s is. He has been so faithful and blessed us more than we could have ever imagined!

In 2009, Jason and I took a step of faith and began the process of planting a church. We went from working at an established church with a “secure” financial plan, to raising our salary and budget for our baby church plant.

We also had our third child in 2009. After I delivered Sarah, I had several complications. Complications that led to two ER visits, three surgeries, physical therapy, steroid injections, and the list goes on.

Here we were, about to leave our “safe” church and start a new work that God had called us to and the medical bills were piling up faster than we could keep track.

Over the course of my illness, I was so thankful for the way my husband handled the stress of our bills. I know that he struggles somewhat with trying to gain financial security, (what man doesn’t?). I never felt the weight or stress of his concerns through his behavior towards me. He was very gracious and just wanted me to get better, no matter the cost. I was so thankful and it was one less thing that I really worried about.

After the dust settled, we were left with about $10,000 in medical bills. Ten thousand dollars that we didn’t have and that we knew was going to take a while for us to pay off. Jason has admitted that there were days that he was tempted not to tithe, and instead to pay off a medical bill here and a medical bill there. But he didn’t. And we just kept trusting in God that He would take care of our family like He always does.

One day Jason got a call from a friend at our previous church. Someone had dropped off an envelope addressed to our family. When Jason opened the card, inside was a cashier’s check for $10,000. He immediately had to sit down because he was certain he was going to pass out!! Then he came home and handed the card to me and I thought for sure it must have been a joke. I just kind of looked at him like, “um, this isn’t very funny. Why are you tricking me like this??”

It was real people. Very real. All I could think to myself was, “This is how much my daddy loves me.” This is a gift from my father in Heaven who loves me and wants to bless me. Why do I ever worry about anything? Why do I ever doubt? God isn’t bound by anything. All of the creation bows down to Him. All the money, it belongs to Him too. He can do whatever He wants with it. How silly am I to think that taking care of financial burdens is too insignificant for Him. How blessed am I to have a Daddy who loves me like that. Unbelievable.

Thank you Jesus. And thank you to the anonymous giver who was used mightily by God in our life.

Thank you, Mindy. Amazing proof that the seemingly too big is never too big for Him.

Interested in Sharing Your Story? Click here to find out how.

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2/13/11

Among Markers and Racing Cars




Instead of spending my Sunday morning soaking up a sermon, I spent my Sunday morning soaking up glass after glass of spilled water. I spent my Sunday morning searching for marker tops, and I spent my Sunday morning pointing out, in my best teacher voice, that one can actually race cars without throwing them through the air.

Yes, it was my turn to volunteer in Kids' Church, and that's fine, except I really wanted to sit in big people's church, and you know, um, learn something.

Then came the lesson. Jesus heals ten lepers, and only one returns to thank Him, Luke 17:11-19.

What a bunch of ingrates. Imagine experiencing such a miracle, and not offering thanks.

Oh, wait.

Then came the thought that God placed me in that tiny, blue chair for a reason.

I needed to hear about thankfulness, and my lesson on thankfulness needed to be at a level that even the four and five year olds surrounding me could understand.

When I am thankful, I need to express thanks.

So today I’m thankful for clean sheets, a devoted sister, a husband who knows how to prepare for a party "like nobody’s business", working part-time, far away friends, sidewalk chalk drawings, all of you, who click your way back here week after week, and new opportunities.

Yes, expressing thanks. Because the first step in giving is realizing just how much you have, and even though I think I have that figured out, sometimes I need to return to the tiny, blue chair and learn it again.

What about you? Can you think of a time when you knew you were in the right place?

Links:




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2/10/11

Pout, Pout, Stomp, Stomp

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Dear God,

I worry about my limitations.

At times, I feel I possess nothing to give.

Stomp, stomp.

And, that I am talentless.

Pout, pout.

And there are masses of people smarter, better, and more compassionate than I am.

More stomping.

And these golden people spout Bible verses on every occasion. The only thing I spout is sarcasm (and an occasional curse word, um, sorry about that).

More pouting.

To finish reading click here. I'd love for you to visit me at From Doing to Being.

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*Comments are turned off.

2/9/11

Share Your Story (Meet Rachel Molder-A Year of Muffins)

In today's Share Your Story, we meet Rachel Molder. Rachel doesn't mind giving money because she doesn't miss it after it is gone. However, this year Rachel challenged herself to give something she covets most, her time and her energy. Here’s Rachel story about the seemingly easy task of making muffins, and what she learned amid flour, sugar, and finely chopped walnuts.

It started with a Facebook prompt: I, for one, am tired of cookie cutter store-bought items. I promise to send something homemade to the first five people who leave a comment on this update. In turn, you promise to re-post this as your status. The rules are that the items must be made by you personally and must be received by your five folks within 2011. Be creative and let's see what we can come up with!

How often do we sign up for these silly prompts expecting nothing to really happen? Well, yesterday I dispatched 6 muffins to the first girl to sign my prompt. It wasn't as easy as I expected it to be.

Why is giving hard?

I started with a batch of banana muffins last week, but they collapsed because I didn't bake them long enough. So we had to eat a dozen sticky sweet muffins - daughter loved them!

Then on Sunday I baked a batch of Buttermilk Spice Muffins and created a home logo/letter - which took me until 11pm on a work night - arrrugh! And I kept wanting to make an actual book style, that folds and has pages - I had to tell myself to STOP!


Why can't I do anything small? It has to be impressive, well thought out, worth the $7.90 postage.

On Monday I labored to find the perfect box at work. Nothing fit. I spent almost an hour looking for packaging materials! Huh? Why isn't giving easier? It's LABOR! I want to give up.

At first, I was ambitious, wanting to send muffins to everyone on my fifty person Christmas card list - how cool would it be to receive gifts randomly throughout the year? Now, I just want to make it through the five people on my Facebook list!

I've wondered if the challenges faced are because giving should NOT be easy. It's easy to give money. I've given money over the years, once it's gone from my account I don't miss it.

My time and energy I DO covet. My house is dirty, the dishes are piled up in the kitchen, I NEED to spend more time surfing the internet - kidding (giant grin). My point is that my initial desire to make muffins for all my friends is not dimmed but definitely harder and more work then I imagined. Or maybe I just need more practice giving!

Thanks, Rachel. Do you have a story you'd like to share about giving? Take a minute and check out Share Your Story.

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2/7/11

A Picture of Paradoxes

When I get honest, I admit I am a bundle of paradoxes. I believe and I doubt, I hope and I get discouraged, I love and I hate, I feel bad about feeling good, I feel guilty about not feeling guilty. I am trusting and suspicious. I am honest, and I still play games.
–Brennan Manning, Reflections for Ragamuffins

Can you relate?

Me too.

I throw myself into the cyber world for all to know, and I hide under my white, down comforter, and hope no one notices. A message wanders around my head screaming, and my mouth remains silent. I am lay-down-in-the-street loyal, and devoted to only a select few. I volunteer first, and follow-through last.

Are you a person of opposites? Do you think one way, but live in a place of stark contrast? What do you believe, but struggle to live?

Hanging with Jen and friends today.

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2/5/11

Finding Simple


When I think of simplifying, I think of this.

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Because often adult brains complicate love and friendship and hurt and forgiveness.


When I think of simplifying, I think of this.

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Because cluttered lives lead us away from our real loves and goals and dreams and faith.


When I think of simplifying, I think of this.

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Because focused determinataion confuses us, and often in buying and striving and toiling and accomplishing we only complicate life.


How do you make life more complicated than it really is? Joining with Cheryl today as she starts her Simplify Journey.


2/4/11

Two Facts This Friday

I just wanted to wish everyone a great weekend, and let you know my post from a couple of days ago,"I Delivered My Baby on the Side of the Road" is reprinted today over at The High Calling (woo-hoo, a bigger audience means more Birthing Kits!), and remind you that Kendal is taking questions about her book, Full here through Sunday.


If you missed either post the first time around, I'd love to have you catch them both!

*Comments are turned off.


2/3/11

An Eating Disorder, Full, and a Book For You

Being generous involves more than sharing your time, money, and talents. Sometimes generosity involves sharing your heartache.

Meet Kendal Privette, wife, mother, poet, friend, teacher, and woman who triumphed over anorexia.

In Kendal’s book Full, readers meet the sweet-talking and ever-powerful Ed (Kendal’s name for her Eating Disorder).

At first, the words Ed whisper make sense, and seem reasonable. Just two pounds.

But as time passes, Ed firmly grips Kendal’s body and mind, and demands full obedience. How is that obedience measured? By Ed’s strongest weapon, the scale.

Documenting her three-year war with anorexia, Kendal uses poems and numbers (an indication of weight) to allow readers a glimpse into her raging battle.

120

Hunger,

My new love,

a fingertip of ED,

beckons

like a grandmother’s

long, bony finger

calling a child

closer,

closer.

my thoughts are of nothing

but

hunger

and how to keep him

closer,

closer.

Full is the result of one broken girl scribbling out her struggle for the world to read. Full is a reminder of our search and the search of our sisters, girlfriends, mothers, and daughters to find something to fill that God-shaped hole in our souls. Full is a story of desperation, restoration, and God’s abundant grace.

Now ready for the fun? Kendal is with us today.


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Loud cheering.

In order to build a better understanding around anorexia and share about her book, Kendal agreed to answer our questions about this disorder.

And Kendal is giving away a free copy of her book, Full.

More cheering.

How do you get your hot, little hands on a copy?

Simple. In my comment section, ask Kendal a question about anorexia, her experience with the disorder, or her decision to write a book, and Kendal will reply to each question. Then on Sunday, February 6th, we will randomly draw one person to receive a free copy of Full.

Kendal shares about anorexia and her book. We become educated, and one lucky reader gets a free book. I love it.