In today's Share Your Story, we meet Tiffini from The House of Belonging. Mother, photographer, writer, and friend, Tiffini intends to jump naked into life, and after reading this, she may just leap into your heart too. Here's Tiffini-
Were you ever in so much pain you couldn't feel anymore? I am. One of my "aha moments" was realizing I can't live inside my seemingly insurmountable prison walls of pain.
I refuse to live trapped any longer.
Today I am sharing small things that are bringing joy back into my life.
"Friendship doubles your joys, and divides your sorrows."
As I talked with God, I believe these are prayer wrought outcomes. The Father is hearing. I am hearing, and then, I am doing.
● Giving to others - my time, my prayers, my help, my abilites. Saving our change for New Day Foster Home.These are building-up things.
● Giving to myself- taking time to heal my sick soul, taking time for me, taking care of my health.
● Giving to my family- living with less, working towards living simply, learning to cook whole foods.
● Listening more-This pain really does take over and fully destroy a family leaving it broken and not useful. Unhealthiness can become all consuming, and the children suffer from parental starvation.
I noticed change when I began to live life instead of observing, and when I began getting involved somewhere. I started small.
● Praying for a real friend. Allowing God to pick your friends. Fleshly ones. The ones that come birthed through prayer seem to be just the right ones. God has brought a sweet friendship into my life that really does live next door. I am also making some new friends here in our blog world.
● Blogging. It helped take some of the pressure off of my mind to put thoughts onto "paper". Stuff has to go somewhere. It has to have an outlet. This has become my outlet. This past October, my daughter encouraged me to start blogging, and the biggest gift thus far, is the friends I am making. I've never met any of them (yet), but God is weaving a net under me even now.
The pain is still very much throbbing - the difference I think - is me. I am daily - intentionally - choosing to let go what has been tightly held in my right hand.
He feeds on ashes; a deceived heart has turned him aside. And he cannot deliver himself, nor say, " Is there not a lie in my right hand?"
My blog is new. I am not sure where God wants it to go, and that is ok. At the beginning of the year, I stopped sharing about my pain as much. I wanted to open my heart up more in other areas. I want to explore areas in my life that the pain has overshadowed and never allowed to grow.
I am a broken human being. None of what I shared above has come without much tears and weeping. I mess up all the time. I have struggled with my value, and thoughts of not being enough. Letting go of control and allowing Him to change us is hard and painful. Allowing the light to peer into our dirty mess of a heart is like having open heart surgery without anesthetic.
I pray this year is the year my kids and I can ring the freedom bell. Yes Beth, I can really hear it ringing in the distance.
If you are suffering in silence and trapped inside your prison walls of pain, please know you are not alone. There is HOPE. Hope is a person. Just keep breathing.
I will close with this. Here is a word picture that came to my mind the other day.
Close your eyes, sweet one, relax, and breathe in and out sowly. Now stretch out your hands in front of you. I know your head is hanging down.He is waiting. Go ahead, hold your hand up there. The softest sweetest love takes your hand so tenderly. It wraps itself around your cry. Just let it soak in. No rushing here. Let the love envelope you starting at your fingertips and moving down. Washing away the pain and the noise of the day. Let the love whisper to you - You are not alone.You are OK. Let it continue to wash all yuck away. As you breathe in, breathe in Him. As you breathe out, breathe out you.
He cupped my chin
I am here. You do not have to sit in this darkness anymore. Lift up your head. Come. I will never tire of helping you up.
I would be blessed and encouraged beyond measure to hear ways you have refused to live trapped. What have you added to your life that has it going in another direction?
Loved this article!
Thank you Tiffini. Click over to Tiffini's, and find out about her Word-Women Wednesdays, being vulnerable, real-life, and jumping naked.