When I passed this on the way to work three weeks ago, my immediate thought was poor farmer, in a matter of days you will have an empty trailer and a bunch of smashed pumpkins.
The honor system? Who is going to pay based on the honor system?
Yes, poor, silly farmer. Indeed, losing all of your pumpkins will be a tough lesson to learn. However, it is good your misplaced trust only involves pumpkins and not something of true importance.
I guess that farmer will learn.
But wait…
Each day as I passed, the pumpkins remained. I looked and looked for slippery goo or smashed-up shells around the trailer, but I never saw any. Then one day, I saw a woman shoving bills in the money slot. The next day, I saw a father and daughter smiling happily around the pile. Later in the week, I saw a man opening his wallet as he stood in front of the trailer.
Really? As a former city girl, I sometimes struggle to understand the ways of people in western North Carolina, or the idea of having faith in those you don't know.
Maybe that farmer understands more about people than I do.
Maybe that farmer could teach this poor, silly girl something about honor, and GIVING strangers trust.
Giving trust to those around you is often difficult. Are you typically a trusting person, or does someone have to work to earn your trust?
15 comments:
Great post, Amy! I'm afraid that I would have been skeptical too- especially with the pumpkins. That is heartwarming to see that he was honored though...
We have a farmer around here that does the same thing. The sign actually reads "Pay on the honor system" the first fall I read that I thought..."yea, nice thought...but, who is really going to pay when left out in the open alone?"....{And I am from MN..that is MN nice..and I still thought that} I guess I too don't give others the benefit of the doubt.
Poor, silly me! UGH!
I too saw people paying "the box" and I too never noticed a smashed pumpkin on the road...at least NOT BEFORE Halloween... although there are a few after.
Now, I try, try, try to trust before judging...what is hard ...is after the trust is broken to forgive and learn to trust again.
;-)
There's a woman near where I live who grows her own fruit and vegetables and she sets them out at the end of her driveway to sell using the honor system! As far as I know, she's never had a problem. I think when people know they're being trusted, they live up to that. Most people are good. It just doesn't seem that way because only bad things make the news and get attention. If only the good things got as much attention then people would have more hope and trust!
Great post. Thanks for sharing!
this makes you think about the standard you expect people to uphold to. If it's high enough then they want to live up to that.This is good for every day living isn't it?
That is really sweet, and I would have chuckled, too. Can you imagine an honor system of selling pumpkins at Twin Oaks? Holy Cow! The poor farmer would have been out a trailer full of pumpkins. That's great. And, yes, I have trust issues. Still working through them! :)
We have a sunflower farmer nearby that does the same and it makes me smile to see it. I have always thought I would rather have a tender heart that trusts and might get taken advantage of now and again rather than a cynical one that may miss the opportunity to be surprised by the good in people.
What a cool post!! My general philosophy is to trust people until they give me a reason not to, within reason. Call me an idealist, I want to have faith in people!
I'm probably pretty trusting myself, but I always found it hard to teach this to my kids. You know? You don't want to scare them or grow smart-aleck little cynics, but you want them to be wise. I remember how hard it was to break it to them -- "Honey, I don't think he really means that" or "Some people might steal, even though it's wrong." It's all about balance, isn't it?
Personally, I've glad to hear things went well for the silly farmer!
Trusting to a fault - except when it comes to my children. Then not so much but in most other areas, yes. My hubs likes to make fun of me about this.
I love how this operates and it doesn't seem like anyone takes advantage of him - perhaps when we show that we trust, it builds confidence and relationship and confidence and relationship lead to mutual trust. I don't know....Just thinking as I write...:)
Hope you are having a great weekend, sweet Amy!
Natalie at Mommy on Fire
http://www.mommyonfire.com
Excellent post, Amy! Thanks for sharing your thoughts and teaching us all how to be more introspective. xo
Linked here from Heather's blog.
Honor used to be the backbone of the country. Thankfully, among some people, it still is!
My mother grew up in NYC in the 1940s and 50s. Businesses frequently set up tables outside their stores to sell newspapers, fruit and other small items on the honor system. They would put a can on the table and trust you to take the items you wanted and put the appropriate money in the can. New York City!
Glad to see honor still prevails in some places. Good post.
Wow, this is very interesting. I would have thought the same as you, Amy. What a refreshing picture of honor, it's encouraging to hear about it.
I love this about middle America. We noticed the same thing when we went camping a couple of weeks ago. (Wood for sale, honor system!)
I can learn a lot from this farmer!
love this amy! you were one of the first to comment on my blog www.findtheflametofan.blogspot.com and i think you were starting out blogging?? anyhow, look at you now--love that you're a city girl learning to trust in the country:) i'm kind of going the reverse and internationally so:)
I would have thought the EXACT same thing about that farmer!!!
As a city girl - I always expect the worst and am rarely surprised when others do wrong by me. I should be more trusting and am envious of my naive friends. But, being born and raised just outside DC, that is not my lot in life. I am also never that disappointed when I get short-changed. I trust my husband 100%, and some family members. That's it though. It takes a long time to gain my trust. However, I don't let on that you haven't earned my trust. That is unfair. I always give people the benefit of the doubt and pretend to be 100% trusting and naive. When I come across truly good people, I am always pleasantly surprised. I don't often come across terrible people...I think maybe they know better than to mess with me ;)
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